Crying

I am not your typical girl, in, like, any way. I am not a crier. Things don't get me "right here." Sure, I feel sad about things, but 9 times out of 10 my tears are out of anger or frustration. I don't cry at a sad movie, or during a sad book. I am rather stoic in the face of heartbreaking news. I am not bragging about this. I mean, I want to be normal. I want to cry more. But somewhere along the way I convinced myself that I am a tough chick and I don't cry - very often.

But last year, four days from now, my grandma passed away. And I cried. A lot. For days. After the wake and funeral I sat at home with my eight month old daughter and bawled. I cried because my grandma was gone. I cried for my dad and aunt and uncle, who in five short years lost both their parents. I cried for my daughter who would never really get to know her Gigima - the person who was possibly the happiest in the world besides my husband and myself to learn I was expecting. I cried for the holidays that would never be the same and the every days that would never be the same. I cried that I almost tried to talk my grandma out of changing her plans so Lily and I could visit, since we would see her at Thanksgiving just a couple short weeks away. Thank God she changed them and we visited when we did. I still well up a little when Lily plays with the doll that my grandma had already bought for Lily's Christmas present, or the little books she had bought her just because.

But I also smile.

No matter how much I miss my grandma, time has given me the opportunity to smile now at the memories that nearly a year ago brought me to my knees in tears. The holidays, the regular days. The special treats and the way she brought our family together. The dollars for soccer goals scored and the special overnights. I am so extraordinarily lucky because I knew my grandma as both a child and an adult. I know a lot of people that can't say that.

And so, as the anniversary of her death, of her joining my grandpa in Heaven, is upon me, I cry a little, but I smile a lot. And I think that is how she would want it.

I love you Grandma. And I miss you every single day.

Green Smoothies

Well wouldn't you know...a couple days before Thanksgiving and we ALL aren't feeling well. Hubby came home early from work, I have had a headache all day and body aches on and off for a couple days, and Chickie is actually pointing to the tissues telling me "nose", as is "look mommy, I have boogers running down my face." What to do, what to do? Whip up a big ol' batch of green smoothies of course! Many of my favorite bloggers, such as Green and Crunchy and Frugal Babe talk about green smoothies all the time for their health benefits. I make them from time to time, but decided with all of us feeling a little under the weather, a big batch was in order tonight.

But Kelly, you are saying, I thought these were green smoothies. Usually they are, however when you add a whole bunch of frozen blueberries, they take on a purplish tint. The great things about these smoothies is they are packed with nutrition! And you can customize to your liking. Our smoothies today consisted of two bananas, two cups of frozen blueberries, two cups of OJ, and for the green part, almost an entire bag of spinach. With the berries there, you can't even taste the spinach. I blended the OJ and spinach together first. Then I added the blueberries and blended again. Finally I broke the bananas into pieces and gave the blender a final whirl. Other great additions are frozen peaches, frozen strawberries, frozen mango. You can use kale or chard for your greens, though I prefer spinach. For your liquid, just plain water works great. I like the little zing the OJ gives it, personally. You could also do milk or soy milk, but I don't do soy (hubby does). These babies are yummy and nutritious!

Getting Things Done

I woke up yesterday morning and decided it was time to be an adult. You may have thought that living on my own, getting married, having jobs, or you know, that little thing of being responsible for another human being might do it, but apparently I am always a little late to catch on. So I decided that cookies are no longer an appropriate breakfast and house cleaning is something that should be done with a little more regularity.

So that is what I did yesterday.

I cleaned.

And cleaned.

And laundered many, many loads.

I made a menu plan.

I made a grocery list.

I went grocery shopping.

And then I collapsed into bed, utterly exhausted.

But it was so nice to wake up to a clean house, full fridge, and solid plan for our meals for the rest of the week.

And I feel so grown up.

Who knew? Being an adult can be kinda rewarding!

i went to the gym today. it felt good. and bad. good to be working out, using my muscles. bad to be working my muscles and lungs that haven't seen enough strenuous work as of late. but i am pleased with myself, and if i accomplish nothing else today, at least i worked out. and there is a very real possibility i will accomplish nothing more today. because now i am totally pooped.

i was a little worried that after not going to childcare for a while, chickie wouldn't be thrilled. and she didn't seem that excited when we were walking in. joke's on me though - she pitched a major fit when it was time to go. that is, once we caught her. she was running around and climbing on the big climby thing (think like McD's playland). this further proves my theory that anything in the world is more fun than hanging out with mommy all day.

so friends, i have a favor to ask. please check in on me periodically and make sure i hit the gym more frequently. because, you see, i am fat and out of shape. and i have dreams of owning a really cute pair of GAP jeans. why GAP jeans? i don't know, but i want to buy a killer pair. and i want to wear shorts next summer. and i want a good butt, and great legs, and not to look perpetually pregnant. oh yeah, it would be nice to be healthy as well. so....cheers to the sore muscles i am sure to have tomorrow!

Saturday...

...started with a perfect mug of hot coffee...




...up next was raking and playing in the leaves...








...then inside for a snack...





...it was also Halloween. Chickie was Abby Cadabby from Sesame Street...






...we did a little trick or treating...







...and then stopped by a party. But my little Abby Cadabby was all tuckered out!




THE END